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Mini Man-sode 45: Friendzoned for Three Years + The Secret to Growing as a Man


Will Chung

Today JJ is joined by Will Chung to talk about being friendzoned for three years and the secret to growing as a man. 


Hey guys welcome back to another men’s minisode! We’re back with another guest today, Will Chung! Please share this episode with a friend who you want to be a deeper friend with. Will is the lead pastor of Beloved Church. He was born and raised in Seoul. He became a Christian when he was 16 and became a youth pastor at 18. He is now 30 years old married with 3 children, Karis, Kairos, and Zoey. 

What’s the importance of being around and observing healthy godly marriage?

Wil thinks everyone needs a picture to aspire to. So when you’re around healthy couple it gives you an inspiration and hope that one day you can be godly, loving, and scrafical enough to love like that man does. A lot of it also came from reading books and being mentored through those. Expose is key. Being around godly people. Learning form experts. 

From a young age were you always that egar to invest in yourself and read books like that?

Will was really focused on serving God. His main priority was growing in godliness, learn the word of God, fulfill his purpose, being a student studying and pastoring on the weekends. When you have biblical values and convictions and those are your highest priorities and you meet someone else who embodies those same values that’s when the attraction happens. 

Whatever you value the most will be what’s most attractive to you. 

The greatest gift you can give your future spouse is the healthiest you. 

What’s it going to take to get a single man to invest in his mental and spiritual health specifically though therapy and discipleship?

Will doesn’t think it’s that the single christian male doesn’t want it. It’s that he may not realize that there are spaces or areas to do that. Men are looking for people who have the practical resources to get them the healing. They need explosure to sermons and resources. 

Your confict with your roommates and friends is preparation for a future spouse. Everything is training and preparation for what’s to come. You’ve got to be able to be honest, vulnerable and receive feedback. 

Don’t just talk about it, BE about it

Leading from weakness. Leading with authenticity. Leading with vulnerability. It’s when we’re vulnerable and weak that people can connect to us. Just be normal and honest. Men have to be shown what it looks like to be emotionally healthy. They have to be shown a safe space. 

Will had that safe space with brothers in church. They met every week for 7 years. They started every week by confessing sin. 

Emotionally Healthy Spirituallity: The long did it take you guys to get past that surface level 20%?

It takes time. About 1 or 2 years. You’ll only be as vulnerable as you are in a safe space. Relationships and friendships by nature shift. It takes intentionality. 

Last piece of advice for the single man listening…

Find safe space with other men. Without that it’ll be really hard to do the hard work. 

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Will Chung

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I am married to the most beautiful Andrea Chung and father to two beautiful little children; Karis and Kairos. My wife and I are new church planters of Beloved Church and founders of The Meeting Place.

I was born and raised in Seoul, South Korea until I was 15 years old. I grew up on a U.S. Army Base in Seoul and got into a lot of trouble as a youth. Eventually I had to leave the country as a result of some bad choices I made in life. On February 18, 2006, I had a personal encounter with the love of Jesus for the first time at a Saturday night service being held at a small local church in Champaign-Urbana, Illinois. A couple years later I found myself as a youth pastor when I was 18 years old. I served as a youth and college pastor for 8 years in Los Angeles and Orange County, California and as a volunteer staff for 10 years with 4 Christ Mission.

My aim in life, is to in communion with God.

I graduated from Talbot School of Theology with a M. Div in Evangelism and Discipleship. I am also an associate of Leadership Network and Exponential, on the core team of Initiative Network and an Advisory Board Member for The Arrow Movement and the United States National Prayer Council.

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