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Mini Man-sode 06: The Single Man's Kryptonite


JJ Tomlin

Join JJ as he talks through the single man’s kryptonite, passivity and complacency, and how to move through this into zeal for God. 


  • To clarify, we don’t have an absence of ZEAL - we are all ZEALOUS about something in our life (sports, hobbies, pleasure). 
  • ZEAL is all about what we love and against what we hate. 
  • We do have a mis-application of ZEAL in our life problem.
  • Zeal is like the heat that brings a pot to a boil–it causes our affections for God to come to a boil so that we pursue what delights him and fight against what dishonors him.
  • Zeal is the spiritual heat, spiritual energy that spills out through the godly characteristics of love, joy, hope, peace, and so on. It affects every part of the Christian life, making us zealous in the way we love, zealous in the way we express hope, zealous in every area and every characteristic and every fruit of the Spirit.

Backseat driver complacency or a everything-will-work-out-complacency

  • God-is-sovereign and I am on His timeline. It is all in His control. Imma just re-laxxxx and do my thing, God’s got this after all. With this thinking we lose participation in HIS story, we depart from the responsibility of ACTION and GROWTH. 
  • God’s story should call all of us - time, attention, heart, soul and ACTION
  • God’s call is for us to BE CO-LABORERS, PARTICIPATORS, ACTORS in his STORY


  • We become passive, complacent, sidelined in the mission. We teach ourselves to fail in action, protection, defending and leading. How do you think that sounds for a husband? Does that sound like it would make a great spouse and leader?
  • Our very mission is at stake when we are passive. We are called on a great mission, the great commission, to partner and co-labor in the harvest of lost souls, to fight against the darkness of the world, we are called to die to self, sacrifice for others, confront fellow brothers in the body, stand against injustice. There is so much more than ourself at stake!
  • I love the idea of our warfare because as soldiers, we have so many great cinematic pictures of manly movies or war movies. In all these movies - what are the soldiers doing? They are TRAINING, they are WORKING, they are ON MISSION 
  • Jesus did not call us to backseat complacency when HE said it is FINISHED.. He was talking about the end game, the battle will be won.. HE WILL RETURN.. But in the meantime the battle is taking place with very high stakes!

What do we do??

  • Here’s how we change it – channel our zeal, our joy power to be fully focused.  For the joy set before him, he endured. He executed, he shouldered, he resisted. 
  • God gives his children his Spirit to be able to move beyond passivity, complacency procrastination into a life that honors, executes and glorifies Him. 


  • We need to revitalize our prayer life. It should be full of worship, awe, ASKING,  delighting, and reflection. 

God’s Word

  • The Word must FEED our passion, it must minister to our hearts. 
  • Litmus Test: if the word is just words in our mind that doesnt change us or transform us, we are listening with our mind NOT with our soul and heart!


  • PROVOKING one another to love and good works
  • Be around people who are spiritually more mature, more gracious, more zealous, more devoted. 

Joy Power OVER Will Power…

  • Resistance for MORE, for something GREATER… 
  • Sometimes that Bible, life group, church, intimate prayer time… it appears boring, unappealing, hard to get to, inconvenient, foreign. This is where our heart and mind must make the conscious decision to depriortize, justify and in faith know between the choice of netflix or devotion, one feeds / awakes the soul and the other puts it to sleep.. Makes the burner cold. 

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JJ Tomlin

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JJ Tomlin is a missionary kid born in Belgium, originally from Tennessee, and currently residing in the OC. He currently works in Gaming/E-Commerce, enjoys watching his Tennessee Titans on Sundays with his Goldendoodle Teddy and loves working with Christian men to raise the bar in singleness and dating.

Website IconPodcast Mic IconInstagram IconFacebook IconLinkedIn IconTick Tok IconTwitter IconYoutube IconCustom Icon

Website IconPodcast Mic IconInstagram IconFacebook IconLinkedIn IconTick Tok IconTwitter IconYoutube IconCustom Icon

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