• Karrie learned that it was primarily a coping mechanism that allowed her to focus on the other person so that she would never have to really look at herself.  
• She found that deep down inside she knew she needed a hero but could not stand being weak so if she could be strong for someone else it would also make her strong for herself. .
• She found that she never truly became the hero that her partner needed and at the same time she never found the rescue that she needed.
• Kait and Karrie discussed the elements of codependency prominent in being addicted to wanting to rescue or save a person within a relationship.

‍

• Karrie explains that you attract who you are and what you truly hold as a value inwardly is what you seek in others in a relationship.   
• If you want freedom and if you want healthy relationships then you have to look inward and start to heal what has been broken so that you have these items in you
• Relationships hit the core stories of our lives and they start to replay what we lived in our early formative years.

‍

“If there’s anyone harming you, You DO have the authority, power, and ability to remove yourself.”

‍

‍

• Karrie explains the steps it takes to get to the point of wanting to realize your brokenness and change. These steps include looking into the data and walking through the grieving process with others surrounding you and supporting you.
• We were built for community and weren’t meant to walk the journey alone.
• What is broken in a relationship must be healed in a relationship and we need somebody who’s gonna hold and witness our pain.
• If you want to be free, You first have to take the time to figure out for yourself what that freedom looks like for you.
• Remember, there is no Mr. Right. there is only YOU being right with God.

“The particularities of your pain produce the particularities of your actual calling and vocation on this planet.”

‍

• We cannot bypass our story of healing with good attitudes and feelings or just good words and silver linings. We have to go through a process.

• It is not until you have a witness to your pain and a witness to your story that someone allows you the space to grieve so that then you can move towards places of restoration, repentance, and forgiveness.
• What was broken in your family of origin can actually begin to be healed in the family of God.
• You have to face the truth of what you experienced and look at what you believe is not true.

“Resurrection does not come through bypassing what needs to be grieved, named, or addressed.”

‍

‍

• “Work on your story, allow your story to be healed. There is no Mr. Right, there is exactly who’s gonna come into your life because you have invested the time to become exactly who God created you to be.”
• “Freedom is the courageous act of loving who you are created to be.”
• “You are worthy of the work that needs to be put in and nothing tastes as good as freedom.”